By BEST Childcare Consulting
When something frightening happens in the world, it doesn’t stay on the news — it enters our homes, our workplaces, and our hearts. The recent events in Bondi have deeply shaken many adults, and even when we try to protect them, our youngest children feel it too.
Babies and young children do not understand headlines or details, but they are highly attuned to the emotions of the adults around them. They sense changes in tone, body language, routines, and emotional energy. When adults feel distressed, children often feel unsettled — even without words being spoken.
In early childhood education and at home, our role is not to explain tragedy, but to hold safety, calm, and connection. This article has been created to gently support educators and families in responding to children under five with reassurance, age-appropriate language, emotional safety, and compassion — while also recognising the importance of caring for ourselves as adults.
There are no perfect words in moments like these. What matters most is presence, predictability, and love.
On 14 December 2025, a mass shooting occurred at Bondi Beach in Sydney during a Hanukkah celebration, resulting in multiple deaths and injuries. Authorities have classified it as a terrorist attack with antisemitic motives and are continuing investigations.
For adults, this is deeply upsetting — and young children can sense this distress even if they don’t understand the details. What they need most right now is reassurance, safety, and simplified, truthful communication.
Why We Can’t Always Avoid Talking About Scary Things
It can feel protective to shield children from frightening events — and for very young children, we absolutely do limit details and exposure. But completely avoiding scary topics isn’t always helpful, especially when children are already sensing that something is wrong.
Children Notice More Than We Think
Even when adults say nothing, children pick up on:
- changes in adult mood or behaviour
- hushed conversations
- altered routines
- emotional tension in the room
When something feels “off” but no one explains it, children often fill in the gaps themselves — and their imagination can be far scarier than the truth.
Silence Can Increase Anxiety
When children sense fear but receive no explanation, they may:
- assume the danger is close or ongoing
- think they caused the problem
- feel unsafe but unsure why
A simple, reassuring explanation helps anchor their understanding and reduces uncertainty.
Talking Builds Safety, Not Fear
When adults acknowledge that something scary happened and immediately return to safety, children learn:
- feelings can be talked about
- adults notice and respond
- scary moments can be survived with support
This strengthens trust and emotional resilience.
We Talk Differently With Young Children
Talking does not mean sharing details.
For children under five, it means:
- naming feelings simply
- reassuring safety
- answering only what is asked
- keeping explanations brief and calm
For example:
“Something scary happened, but we are safe and helpers are helping.”
This is very different from adult conversations or news coverage.
Avoidance Can Delay Processing
When scary topics are completely avoided, children may:
- repeatedly ask questions
- show distress through behaviour
- struggle to make sense of emotions later
Gentle acknowledgement allows children to process emotions in small, manageable pieces — with trusted adults beside them.
The Goal Is Not to Scare — It’s to Soothe
We don’t talk about scary things to educate children about danger.
We talk about them to:
✔ reassure
✔ regulate emotions
✔ model calm coping
✔ restore a sense of safety
When done well, talking actually reduces fear.
Specific Advice for Early Childhood Classrooms
1. Your Calm Is the Curriculum
Children co-regulate through adults. In the days following a distressing event, how you are matters more than what you say.
- Keep your voice slow, soft, and steady
- Maintain familiar routines wherever possible
- Offer extra warmth, reassurance, and physical closeness (within policy and child comfort)
- Avoid rushed transitions or overstimulation
A calm classroom helps children’s nervous systems settle.
How to Talk to Children Under 5
For Babies & Toddlers (0–2 years)
Babies do not need explanations.
✔ Focus on:
- Comfort
- Predictability
- Physical reassurance
Use phrases like:
- “You’re safe.”
- “I’m here.”
- “I’ve got you.”
Hold, rock, sing familiar songs, and maintain normal routines. Your presence is the message.
For Toddlers & Preschoolers (2–5 years)
Only talk about the event if a child asks or shows concern. Do not introduce details proactively.
Use simple, honest, and reassuring language:
- “Something scary happened far away.”
- “Some people were hurt.”
- “Helpers came to keep everyone safe.”
- “We are safe here.”
Avoid:
- Graphic details
- Naming weapons
- Over-explaining
- Speculating or sharing adult fears
If you don’t know the answer:
“I don’t know, but I do know you are safe right now.”
When Children Ask Repetitive Questions
This is a sign they are seeking reassurance, not information.
Respond consistently:
- “Yes, we are safe.”
- “The helpers are doing their jobs.”
- “You’re here with trusted adults.”
Repetition helps children feel secure.
Use Play — Not Discussion — to Support Processing
Children process trauma through play and movement, not conversation.
Helpful classroom experiences:
- Drawing and painting
- Sensory play (playdough, sand, water)
- Quiet construction play
- Comfort books and soft toys
- Outdoor play and movement
Avoid dramatic or violent play prompts. Follow the child’s lead.
Watch Behaviour, Not Just Words
Children may show distress through behaviour changes, including:
- Clinginess or withdrawal
- Increased tears or frustration
- Sleep or toileting regression
- Difficulty separating from caregivers
Respond with patience and reassurance. These behaviours are communication.
What Educators Should NOT Do
- Do not show news footage in the service
- Do not discuss adult fears or opinions near children
- Do not force conversations or emotional expression
- Do not dismiss feelings (“Don’t worry, it’s fine”)
Instead, acknowledge feelings and return to safety.
Babies Feel What We Feel — Even Before They Understand Words
Even very young babies and toddlers — including infants — sense adult distress long before they understand language. Babies are biologically wired to read facial expressions, tone of voice, body tension, and emotional energy. When adults around them are anxious, distressed, or overwhelmed, babies can feel that something is wrong, even if nothing is said aloud.
You may notice this show up as:
- increased clinginess
- unsettled sleep
- fussiness or crying
- difficulty settling or feeding
This is not because babies understand the event — it is because they rely on us to co-regulate their sense of safety.
The most powerful support for babies during times like this is calm, regulated adults. Slow your breathing, soften your voice, hold them close, and keep routines predictable. Even simple actions — rocking, gentle touch, familiar songs, and eye contact — help reassure a baby’s nervous system that they are safe.
For adults, this is also a reminder to care for your own emotional wellbeing. Taking a pause, stepping away from news coverage, and grounding yourself before responding to children is not selfish — it is protective. When you feel calmer, babies and young children feel calmer too.
In early childhood settings and at home, your calm presence is the message.
Books & Read-Aloud Videos for Children Under 5
1. The Colour Monster — Emotions & Feelings
This story helps children explore and name big feelings — happy, sad, scared, angry — in a gentle, colourful way. YouTube
More read-aloud versions you can use:
- The Colour Monster — Alternative Read Aloud (longer)
- The Colour Monster — Another Read Aloud Version
Great for: Naming emotions, promoting emotional literacy.
2. Ten Little Fingers and Ten Little Toes — Connection & Belonging
A warm celebration of babies everywhere and the joy of simple human connection. YouTube
Other read-along options:
- Ten Little Fingers and Ten Little Toes — Daily Read Along
- Ten Little Fingers and Ten Little Toes — Another Version
Great for: Reassurance, belonging, soothing co-regulation.
3. Have You Filled a Bucket Today? — Kindness & Positive Feelings
Helps children think about kindness, caring, and how actions affect others — building emotional safety and empathy. YouTube
Extra version:
Great for: Encouraging kindness and emotional connection after tough news.
Tips for Sharing with Children During/After the Read
After reading, you can ask gentle prompts like:
- “How did that story make you feel?”
- “Which part made you feel safe/happy?”
- “Let’s take a big breath together like the Colour Monster.”
These invite children to name feelings and feel heard — often more important than the words themselves.
Self-Care Reads & Practices for Adults (Educators & Families)
Taking care of yourself makes you more available and emotionally regulated for the children around you — especially after distressing events.
Books for Adult Self-Care & Emotional Resilience
- The Body Keeps the Score — Understanding how stress shows up in the body.
- The Art of Comforting — Practical ways to support others and yourself.
- Calm or Mindfulness for Beginners — Short practices to anchor yourself in the present moment.
Simple Self-Care Practices
- Limit news intake — Step away from rolling coverage when you can.
- Grounding breaths: Inhale for 4 seconds, pause 2, exhale 6.
- Connect with a trusted colleague or friend — Talking helps process emotional tension.
- Movement or fresh air: Even a short walk outside helps regulate stress.
Where to Get Help If You or Your Child Are Feeling Traumatized
After distressing events, it is normal for both adults and children to experience shock, anxiety, sadness, sleep disturbance, or intrusive thoughts. Support is available — you do not have to manage this alone. Seeking help does not mean something is “wrong” with you or your child. It means you are responding with care.
Children recover best when the adults around them are supported too. Reaching out models healthy coping and shows children that help is available when things feel heavy.
If at any time you or someone else is in immediate danger, call 000.
Support for Children & Young People
👶 Kids Helpline (Ages 5–25)
📞 1800 55 1800
💬 Webchat & phone support
🕒 24 hours a day
🔗 https://kidshelpline.com.au
Free, confidential counselling for children and young people. Children can talk, type, or message in a way that feels safest for them.
Headspace (Youth Mental Health – Ages 12–25)
📍 Centres across Australia
💻 Online support via eheadspace
🔗 https://headspace.org.au
Support for young people experiencing anxiety, distress, or trauma, including counselling and wellbeing resources.
Parentline (WA Parents & Carers)
📞 1800 654 432
🕒 24/7
🔗 https://www.parentlinewa.com.au
Confidential phone support for parents who are worried about their child’s emotional wellbeing or behaviour after stressful events.
Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS – WA)
Access via GP or health professional referral
🔗 https://www.health.wa.gov.au/Articles/A_E/Child-and-Adolescent-Mental-Health-Services
Specialist mental health services for children and adolescents experiencing significant distress.
Support for Adults
📞 Lifeline
📞 13 11 14
🕒 24/7
🔗 https://www.lifeline.org.au
Immediate crisis support for anyone feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or unsafe.
Beyond Blue
📞 1300 22 4636
🕒 24/7
🔗 https://www.beyondblue.org.au
Support for anxiety, depression, and trauma — including specific resources for parents, educators, and carers.
Blue Knot Foundation (Trauma & Complex Trauma)
📞 1300 657 380
🕒 Business hours + webchat
🔗 https://www.blueknot.org.au
Specialist support for people impacted by trauma, including vicarious trauma and cumulative stress.
Mental Health Emergency Response Line (WA)
Metro: 📞 1300 555 788
Peel: 📞 1800 676 822
🕒 24/7
🔗 https://www.mhc.wa.gov.au
For urgent mental health support when someone is at risk but not in immediate danger.
13YARN – Aboriginal & Torres Strait Islander Support
📞 13 92 76
🕒 24/7
🔗 https://www.13yarn.org.au
Culturally safe crisis support for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples.
Help for childcare workers in early childhood education
ACA / TELUS Health Employee Assistance Program (EAP)
The Australian Childcare Alliance (ACA) has partnered with TELUS Health (formerly LifeWorks) to offer an Employee Assistance Program (EAP) specifically for early learning services and their staff. This provides confidential mental health support via phone, video, and digital tools, including access through the TELUS Health app and online portal.
Service Access
- TELUS Health EAP Website (for ACA early learning services):
https://www.aca-telushealth-eap.org.au/ aca-telushealth-eap.org.au - TELUS Health One App
• Provides access to wellbeing resources, self-guided mental health tools, and support content.
Note: The app is typically accessed via your workplace’s EAP subscription. Speak with your service director/manager to get your unique access code and login details.
Core Support Contacts (via EAP)
These supports are offered through the ACA/TELUS Health EAP for staff and their immediate family members:
- 24/7 Telephone Support — Immediate assistance for urgent concerns (available anytime).
- Telephone & Video Counselling — Scheduled sessions for personal and work-related stress, anxiety, trauma, family issues, etc.
- Online Resources & Tools — Through the TELUS Health One app and portal.
This EAP is designed to be confidential and employer-paid — individual usage is private and not reported back to the employer.
How to Start Accessing Help
- Ask your director or HR contact if your service is registered with the ACA/TELUS Health EAP.
- Request the access code for the TELUS Health One app/portal.
- Download the TELUS Health One app (available in the Apple App Store or Google Play).
- Use the access details provided by your workplace to log in and connect to services.
If your service is not yet registered, speak to your employer about exploring the ACA member offer or engaging an EAP provider through your organisation. childcarealliance.org.au
Key Points for Educators
- This service is not just for crisis counselling — it includes wellbeing coaching, lifestyle resources, and proactive mental health support.
- Confidentiality is central — your employer does not see your personal support details.
- Immediate access is available via phone and online if you feel overwhelmed, anxious, or triggered by distressing events.
BEST Childcare Consulting
At BEST Childcare Consulting, we believe that children thrive when they feel safe, heard, and emotionally supported — especially during uncertain or distressing times. Supporting children also means supporting the educators and families who care for them every day.
We encourage services to use this guidance thoughtfully, adapt it to their community, and lean on trusted supports when needed. Trauma-informed practice is not about having all the answers — it is about responding with empathy, reflection, and care.
As always, our goal is to help early learning services move beyond compliance and embed meaningful, emotionally responsive practice that supports wellbeing, belonging, and resilience for children, families, and educators alike.
If you need support, guidance, or tailored resources for your service, BEST Childcare Consulting is here to help.
Together, we care. Together, we lead. Together, we support our communities — one child at a time.
